Vol. 18, Issue 1
From Separation to Connection
“How did we get here?” Sound familiar?
Early in our marriage, we struggled with ongoing feelings of powerlessness, shame, and fear. Within the first year, our relationship became deeply strained—marked by unresolved conflict and emotional distance. We often felt stuck between a lack of meaningful support and advice from others that, while well-intentioned, didn’t fully understand our situation.
After eighteen months, the strain had taken its toll. For Jonathan, whose Indian background places a strong emphasis on honor and shame, these challenges felt especially personal. Eventually, we separated, and Jonathan moved in with friends. During this time, Cameron reached out to Haven of Hope.
Though initially hesitant, Jonathan agreed to seek help. We traveled separately from Tennessee to Michigan to be part of the program, and it became a turning point in our relationship. Over time, we experienced restoration, healing, and renewed clarity.
Today, we’re grateful to say our relationship is stronger, deeply connected, and fun again. What once felt like weeks-long cycles of conflict now resolve in an hour or less—by God’s grace. We believe He has brought us through a difficult season into renewed joy and stability. We’ve continued to grow with the support of the BBFR group. It’s exciting to share our wins and stand alongside other growing marriages.
Have you completed a week-long intensive or a Two Hearts One Flame Marriage Retreat but long for more? Email brian@havenofhopes.com or call 616-693-2925 to register for a BBFR Connection Group.
“God has brought us through a difficult season into renewed joy and stability.”
Board Member Spotlight
Caleb & Lilah Gonyou
We are blessed by couples who serve sacrificially on our executive board of directors. It is a joy to introduce you to our board members:
Caleb & Lilah Gonyou
Caleb and Lilah met while they were students at Pensacola Christian College, and they married in 2024. They have been blessed with baby Dahlia this fall.
Caleb is the board treasurer and just earned his Accountant certification finishing his master’s degree. He works full-time as an auditor and owns a used power sport parts business. Lilah works from home making natural candles and crocheting animals. In addition to serving on the HOH board, Caleb volunteers in their church sound booth, and Lilah helps with church events and the nursery.
“Our hearts were touched when we were introduced to HOH’s fantastic mission. We were both looking into using our talents for a Christian ministry, and HOH challenged us in a good way. We’re both being stretched, and we are learning how to do new things for a great cause.”
–Lilah Gonyou
Transformed by God’s Love
“This is just how God made me.” I often hear this in my office as others share about their personality. Whether it’s expressed through boldness that can feel overwhelming to others, or passivity that avoids conflict altogether, the underlying assumption is the same—we are justified in staying as we are, regardless of the impact on those we love.
But Scripture calls us to a higher standard. In I Corinthians 13, we are reminded that no matter how gifted, insightful, or even sacrificial we are, without love, it amounts to nothing. Love is not self-focused or self-protective. It does not push its way forward, nor does it shrink back in fear. Instead, it is patient, selfless, and deeply aware of others.
Strength without empathy can become harsh. Add anger, and it becomes damaging. On the other hand, passivity rooted in fear can appear peaceful on the surface but often lacks the courage to truly engage, leaving others unseen and unheard. When these two patterns meet in a relationship, the result can be painful and complex.
God is not asking us to deny how we are wired—He is inviting us to be transformed by love. Love reshapes boldness into gentleness and gives courage to the passive heart. It brings balance, healing, and connection where there was once tension.
And speaking of growth and expansion, we are excited to welcome Nick and Carol Phillips to the Haven of Hope family. With 30 years of pastoral experience and a decade of clinical counseling, Nick brings a lifetime of experience in working with people and has transitioned from the clinical field into ministry. Together, they are launching a new office in Plymouth, Michigan called Haven of Hope East. We are confident they will be a tremendous blessing to many.
All mentoring appointments will still be scheduled through our main office.
Steve & April Swartz
Executive Director
From Our Women’s Ministry Director
My heart is blessed beyond measure as I journey with each woman that I meet. In this space, lives are being changed, there is worship, there is a turning toward the Heavenly Father, and there is stillness. In this consecrated space, we wait on what the Holy Spirit will do next!
Beth Foltz
Receive Training at HOH
Would you like to learn more about caring for other’s hearts? Haven of Hope would like to equip you!
We offer personal training at our on sight facility. You will observe live sessions through video and audio feed in our private training room. Our mentors walk alongside of you as you learn practical concepts that you can apply to your own walk with the wounded.
For more information on fees and availability, call 616-693-2925 or email melissa@havenofhopes.com.
New Resource-
Pathways Prayer Journal Coming Soon
Practice the Journey of My Heart tool during your daily devotional time. Reach out to us today at 616-693-2925 to preorder your copy.
From Our Clients
